How to Be the Perfect Bridesmaid

Congratulations! You're the chosen one. Chosen to be a bridesmaid, that is! Someone is so fond of you that they've selected you to hold their wedding dress up as they pee, calm their nerves on their big day, make sure their bridal beauty is just right before walking down the aisle, and the list continues...

Depending on your bride, being a bridesmaid can have different meanings. Your pile of to-do's may be up to your ears, or you may feel annoying due to the vast number of times you've asked what there is to do. A healthy in-between is always the best way to be. So, you've been asked to stand next to your friend or sister's side on her big day. You might be trying to figure out what your duties are from the moment you've accepted the position until you wave the bride and groom good-bye.

Like I said, all brides are different and expect different things; but, I've been a bridesmaid in multiple weddings and have been able to receive takeaways each time. Here is what I've learned from my experience as a bridesmaid:

1.) Be willing.

From the moment you've been asked, you should be more than willing to assist the bride with different tasks. Whether it's taking on crafts or keeping track of who gave what at her bridal shower, be willing to help out in any way possible.

2.) Be honest.

When the bride asks for your opinion on certain colors, venues, potential wedding theme, etc, be honest. She really does want your input. That being said, your honesty needs to have the right delivery. For instance, if you're nervous to tell her how that god awful shade of yellow would look dreadful throughout her venue, tell her you like yellow, but that shade is not your favorite; have a few other color alternatives instead.

3.) It's okay if you can't attend everything.

I've been in weddings where I am a plane ride away from the bride. It would be impossible for me to attend a bridal shower, bachelorette party, bridal luncheon, and fly in to help with planning. That being said, you can send a gift to the bridal shower and correspond with the bridesmaid spearheading the bachelorette party to pitch in for the night's festivities. Since you can't physically be there, you are at least making the best effort you can and letting your presence be known.

There is another case where you do live near the bride-to-be, but there were last minute arrangements made for a bachelorette party. It's not your fault if you already had plans a week before you were given notice. In this position, you need to weigh the importance of your scheduled plans versus the bachelorette outing.

4.) It's not about you (at all).

There's nothing wrong with wanting to feel beautiful and confident! But, remember, you come in second on the wedding day. You need to 100% tend to the bride. That might mean it leaves you with 30 minutes to get ready because she needs your help. It's not about you, and during the ceremony, the eyes are on the bride. You're there to either hold the bouquet, make sure her dress looks good, give her (and yourself) tissues, and smile.

I was in my sister's wedding in March, and I kid you not, the pastor said the funniest yet truest statement during the wedding rehearsal to us bridesmaids: "You could be wearing a potato sack and no one would notice." It was hilarious. True, and slightly rude, but hilarious.

5.) Have fun!

At the end of the day, after all the planning and tending to the bride, the best part is popping a little bubbly and celebrating one of the most important days of her life! Laugh with your friends, be goofy, and ruin your dress with sweat and alcohol stains on the dance floor.

What are your tips and tricks to being the perfect bridesmaid?

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